In the seriousness of realizing i am in the art field, and i am going to be doing art as a job, i think i lost sight of what drawing meant to me.

Drawing is calming and enjoyable for me when i am doing it, but i haven't been doing it very much for a long time. Whenever i think about drawing, my mind stops me and it starts to feel like a stressful affair. Art as a job means i will need to sell my creations. Drawing as a profession means i need to be good at it.

What if my art isn't going to come out the way i'd like it? What if my drawings become heavily analyzed and critiqued? Well.. that's a rather good thing as it'll help me grow, but i also want to have the freedom to draw whatever i want without people having to like it or not. And i want to post it online. It's not like i'm so afraid that i have to hide my art from people. I want to have a virtual gallery and have my friends be able to look at my stuff and enjoy it too.

The emotion you put into an art piece is a reflection of yourself. I want to draw more, i want to discover more of who i am. I want people to see who i am too. I feel that even my friends hardly know me enough. I can't fully describe myself in words online, nor can you fully understand me just by meeting me irl. There are certain styles and emotions that only come out in art (any form of it, whether you are an artist, dancer, musician, etc). That leads to [partly] why i wanted to become an artist in the first place - We can express ideals and feelings, and maybe touch someone's heart, with a picture.